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Building Resilience – 20 Seconds At A Time

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In one of my favorite scenes in the movie “We Bought a Zoo”, Matt Damon’s character (Benjamin Mee) talks to his son about facing fears and doing the unthinkable:

“All it takes is 20 seconds of insane courage, 20 seconds of embarrassing bravery, and I promise you something great will come of it!” ~ Benjamin Mee

How often have you shied away from doing something new because of a fear of failure? Do you only start things when you know you will succeed?

Becoming comfortable with uncomfortableness is a current mantra for many successful leaders. It is nearly impossible to grow without some level of discomfort. And yet, leaders often resist seasons of ambiguity and change even while knowing it is the right thing to be able to embrace the tension of those inevitable transitions and phases of not knowing the answers to questions yet.

So how do you start to appreciate ambiguity? How do you practice resilience? How do you begin to find your center in uncomfortableness and continue to breathe through it as scenarios unfold around you at a rapid speed?

I invite you to practice! You can “become comfortable with uncomfortableness” by doing things that get your adrenaline flowing and that stretch you into something new and never done (by you) before.

When you step into Insane Courage and take gasp inducing action, a few things may happen:

1. Wild Animals Threaten to Shred You to Pieces

Fight, Flight, Freeze responses are easily triggered in high-stakes settings. Trust that the “wild animals” in the corporate world may show their fangs and claws but you do not really have to fear for your life. Breathe. Create a pause to think and consider your options before you respond. Practice slowing down in the moment, so you act with intention and in control of your emotions. Trust that the sun will go down and rise again. Take it one step at a time.

2. A Royal Bust Unfolds

Your act of Embarrassing Bravery pivots into an unexpected direction and your idea falls apart for the world to see. Self-directed humor may diffuse tension and allow you recover more or less gracefully. Resisting the temptation to apologize before you know what to apologize for or if an apology is even necessary, exiting with flair and acknowledging the bust are some creative-productive options.

 3. Awkward Silence

Invite a reaction and wait for it, wait for it, wait for it.

 4. A Standing Ovation

Your idea takes off like a rocket ship and your audience is delighted. Accept the applause and the accolades, give credit to the people who supported you and enjoy your spotlight while it lasts.

When the enormous wave of adrenaline has ebbed and you are in back in your safety zone, take a caring look at what you think happened. There is something to learn from any of the above scenarios and more possible outcomes of stepping into the unknown. Stay clear of defensive reasoning and being overly critical of yourself. Own what you contributed to the situation, and consider what you would want to stop, start or change the next time you have an opportunity to practice insane courage. Reflect on your expectations and possible expectations of your audience and give yourself a pat on the back for having stepped into the arena of life and taking a chance.

REFLECTION & ACTION FOR GROWTH

What may be a gasp-inducing action you can take that would open new doors and new possibilities…

… in your professional life?

… in your relationships?

… in your personal life?

What is something you really, really, really want but you have not had the courage yet to take action on?

Create an opportunity for yourself that makes you gasp and that brings you closer to something that is important to you!

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How resilient are YOU? Take a simple resilience survey to assess your readiness to handle ambiguity and challenges.

Take the survey HERE.

I would love to hear about your 20 seconds of bravery!

Friderike Butler, PCC, Human Potential Catalyst

Butler Communication – http://www.DevelopingCreativeLeaders.com

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